Do you ever listen to any of those retro shows that play hair band music from the 80’s? They’re comical. I have to admit, I do love the music. But the hairdos and outfits crack me up. It’s never good when a guy’s long, wavy locks look better than mine!
There’s one song from the 80’s that I remember singing out loud every time it came on. Cheap Trick’s “I Want You to Want Me”. The chorus goes:
I want you to want me
I need you to need me
I’d love you to love me
I’m begging you to beg me
Everyone knew the song back then. It was a party favorite. But we never really thought much about what it was saying. It was just a song.
And yet, listening to it now, it portrays how many of us feel in relationships.
We want to be wanted. We need to be needed. We crave physical and emotional love connections. And we’ll do just about anything to keep someone interested in us.
Even if it means hiding behind a mask. Even if it means pretending to be someone else.
We talked in last week’s blog “A Room Full of Secrets” about how everyone has secrets from the past hidden away. Some are small. Some seem insurmountable. Some cause fear. Some tear at our heart and prevent us from moving forward in life.
We hide secrets because we don’t want people to know about our real life. We’re afraid to let people know the real us.
So we lock our secrets away and put on a mask. We put on a happy face. We pretend that we have it all together. We talk like we know what we’re doing, even though our confidence melts the minute we get home. We say everything is fine. We don’t let anyone get past the surface of who we are or where we’ve been.
Some of us wear our masks for years.
Until one day someone we truly love looks at us and says, “Who are you?” And the truth is that we don’t really know. We’ve been pretending to be someone else for so long that we’ve lost our identity.
We don’t know what we like. We don’t know what we want out of life. We’re numb and tired and empty. We’ve been trying to be who others wanted us to be. Because we want them to want us. We need them to need us. We’d love them to love us. Now we’re begging them not to go.
It’s normal to have desires of being wanted and needed and loved. But we can’t lose ourselves as we try to fulfill those desire. We can’t give ourselves away. We can’t wear a mask to help hide our secrets. We can’t pretend to be someone else so that others will like us and accept us into their crowd.
There is someone who loves us just the way we are. God.
He created us and has specific plans for each one of us. He knows everything we’ve done. He knows every hidden secret. He sees behind the mask. And He can use every bad thing in our life for good if we turn to Him.
God is calling you, the girl behind the mask.
He wants you to know that you’re never alone. He is with you, even right now. And He doesn’t want you to be anyone else. Just you. The girl who is wanted, needed and loved by Him. Without the mask.
The only thing we should hide behind is the love of God.
“You are my hiding place; You will save me from trouble. I sing aloud of Your salvation, because You protect me.” Psalm 32:7 (GNT)
May I pray?
Lord, we want to be wanted and needed and loved. But many of us don’t think anyone could really want or love us if they knew the truth about us. And so we hide it. We put on a mask. We try to be who we think they want. And pretty soon we’re depressed, tired and empty because we don’t know who we are anymore. This isn’t the way life is supposed to be. God, please meet us in this lonely place today. Let us come hide with You. Please help us take off our mask, unlock our secrets, and take a step forward as the real us. Without the mask, and with You by our side. Amen.
Q4U: What mask are you wearing?